Mission from 'Arry English

...I mean, it doesn' matter 'oo it is, I mean, the message gets through Steve: (recorder clicks on mid-sentence)...anyways, 'e did not deserve to get a bollocking... (recorder clicks on and off here)...the time, I know why 'e got a bollocking, because you, you know, you dunno what the fuck 'e's goin' on (someone speaks in background) about, but 'e didn', but 'e didn' deserve it. All 'e's tryin' t'do is relay a message from me to you, right? N' 'e went the wrong way about it, okay? Nicko: Yeh, 'e did go the wrong way about it Steve: Really? Nicko: Well I'm, I, I, I, I tell ya what, I mean it ain't gonna 'appen again Bruce: I don't see where you get steamed, I mean, if the truss was gonna... Nicko: Why I got steamed up Bruce is because 'e fucked me right up. N' I knew there was a problem, I still didn' know what it was even after 'e...I, I fucked! Steve: I know that. Look, it's like... Nicko: I fuckin' fucked-up...n' I stopped, n' it was like "oh, for fuck's sake!" (tapping his foot as if playing drum solo) Come on kids, n' I'm lookin' 'round...what is 'e tryin' to tell me? What's the problem? (mumbles something unintelligible) Steve: Can't you understand? Can't you understand if I'm tryin' to get a fuckin' message through to ya, right?...I'd'a still...it'd a been a lot worse. If I, if I 'ad to go me gear done...as it 'appens, (snaps his fingers) just in the nick o' th'time I got it done. If I... Nicko: Yeah, I still didn't get the message Steve: I know you didn'. But wha' we're sayin' (mumbles something unintelligible) wha'ever 'appens if I got 'im tryin' to get a fuckin' message to ya. Y'know wha' I mean? Nicko: Sure Steve, but the fact is that the guy was not 'andling it the right way Steve: You don' fink o' fings like that Nick Nicko: But that's diff...look...(something completely unintelligible) Steve: I bollocked...I was shou'ing at ya, "look, my gear's gone down" Nicko: It's me that fucked-up Steve: Listen... Nicko: I'm the one out the(r)e all on me own... Steve: I know Nicko: ...I'm doin' a drum solo. N' I've got fuckin' talkin'... Steve: N' I'm the one, I'm only one 'a finking, I've got fucking like a minute t'go before m..., to get this fucking gear right Bruce: Yeah, but if somebody gives a message to me... Steve: No? Bruce: Nicko: Bruce, it's different... Steve: It's a different situation Nicko: ...it's different for you. You're not standin' there all on your fuckin' own 'avin' a somebody try to get your attention n' talk to ya. I'm playin' a drum solo, n' the guy's standin' a yard, or two yards behind my drum riser goin'... Steve: Yeah, all I'm tryin' a... Nicko: ..."fucking anga-yangna-baba"..."wha?"..."BABA-BABA-BABA!"..."WHAAAA???". Fuck! (lets out frustrated grunt) By the time I've got that far, I'm fuckin' totally fucked. Because I'm p..., I'm not payin' attention to my gig... Steve: Ey, look... Nicko: ...I'm payin' attention to what 'e's tryin' to tell me Bruce: Yeh, but nobody woulda noticed Steve: I complete... Nicko: I noticed! Steve: I completely understand that Nicko: Fucked me right up Steve: But 'e, 'e was only doin' wha I told 'im t'do, n' that was get a message t'you. Now that the fucking 'eat o' the moment n' just, everything on 'and...'e don' fink to fucking tell Bill, 'e wants to get the message t'you, not to fucking Bill, so 'e don' fink o' that, 'e just tries to get the message t'you, right? So, 'e don' fucking deserve to get a bollocking for that, I mean, arright 'e got one I know...no say in 'at. But I just don', you know... Bruce: (possibly saying "Attente! Attente!") Steve: ...Bob was a nice guy. 'E's not like 'e's, fuckin', 'e's an asshole... Nicko: No, no... Steve: ...or an idiot, or anyfing like 'at Nicko: Oh no, but 'e was out of order, because 'e didn'... Bruce: 'E wasn't out of order Nicko: "E was Steve: 'E wasn't out of order. 'E was wrong Nicko: 'E was, cause 'e fucked me up by tryin to tell me… Steve: Nicko Nicko: If 'e'd o' come up to the riser... Steve: Nicko Nicko: Look... Steve: Nicko Nicko: ...if 'e'd o' come up to the riser dere, (shouting) I COULDA FUCKIN' 'EARD 'IM!!! Steve: But Nick... Nicko: Cunt was standin' be'ind, I was sittin' down Steve: Yeh... Nicko: ..."bada-bada-ba" Steve: 'E was wrong. 'e made a mistake, but 'e wasn't out of order Bruce: It wasn't deliberate Steve: 'E made a mistake... Nicko: Now, I know it ain't deliberate Steve: ...for fuck's sake Nicko: I didn' know that at the time, right? I still didn't know that Steve 'ad a problem wif 'is bass... Steve: That's wha' I'm sayin' Nicko: ...luckily enough, by the time I finished the poxy solo,'e 'ad 'is bass wo(r)kin' again Steve: It was all that fucking grief... Bruce: All it takes is the guy... Nicko: The grief was, because I bollocked 'im up, n' I 'appened to tell ya (something unintelligible) go out n' apologize right. Fuck 'im, I'm gonna go n' apologize to 'im Bruce: Well all you gotta do... Nicko: It's not for me to apologize. I bollocked 'im cause 'e fucked me up. Right there, 'e fucked me up. 'E was wrong Bruce: All you gotta do...no 'e wasn't wrong Nicko: 'E was Steve: 'E wasn't wrong Nicko: 'E did not 'andle it...'e's not even fuckin' communicating, right? Steve: Aw! I don' wanna fuckin' argue about this, it's fucking stupid...I fink you're really out of order, I fink...honestly Nicko: No bollocks! Oh I am no(t) out of order Steve: You are. You're a'itude is out of order Nicko: 'E...no it ain't Steve: It is Nicko: No it ain't. The guy fucked me up Steve: I know 'e did... Nicko: Well then that's out of order... Steve: ...'e din' mean to Nicko: (close to hysteria) LOOK, I'M NOT SAYIN 'E (Nicko hits something) FUCKIN' MEANT TO 'ARRY!!! (Steve and Bruce say something in background) The fact is that 'e was a dumbkopf, cause 'e don' know 'ow to fuckin' communicate wif me onstage... Bruce: But 'e's not a dumbkopf Steve: (?) Not close (?) Nicko: Aww! Steve: 'E's not fuckin' stupid Nicko: Well, 'e fuckin' certainly did a good job out there this afternoon, didn' 'e? Steve: 'E made a mistake, because I... Nicko: Wha'd'you mean "He made a mistake"? Steve: Because I... Nicko: You sent 'im. 'Ow could 'e make a mistake? Steve: That's why Nicko: 'Ow did 'e make a mistake? Steve: Well, 'e made the mistake by not sendin' Bill first, right? Nicko: Well, well 'e made a mistake, right? Steve: Yeah Nicko: Well, why?... Bruce: There's a difference between makin' a mistake... Steve: Well that's what I'm sayin' Bruce: ...n' a difference between makin' a human error... Nicko: Right, so 'e made a mistake, right? Steve: Yeah! Nicko: N' I'm griefed up cause 'e fuckin' made me made a mistake. Now that 'e...now I can understand wha' 'e was talkin' about after the fact...it remains to be seen, 'e was on a mission from you Steve: Aw, I'm not gonna argue about it Nicko: Right? (it gets quiet for a second) Fuck my ol' boots, it just...I can't 'an, I can't 'andle that situation wif people (something about grief)... n it's important to me t'get a message like that...fuckin' 'ell! I cannot get some...get, get...when' I also fucked as well...I wouldna minded if I'd 'a gotten wha' it was 'appenin' straight. Like, on the end "aw right, 'Arris got 'is bass fucked, right I'll carry on n' do sumfing else", then that's fine, if I didn' fuck-up...but 'e made me fuck. It totally frew me right out, n' 'e wasn'... Steve: I know it did Nicko: ...'e didn't know 'ow to talk to me about it. N', n' I've, I've told 'im "don't do that again." Steve: Because, see, it's not, it's not, it's not fair relaying a message to people. 'E was just... Nicko: N' 'e never turned 'round Steve: ...look, it coulda been anybody. It was just that 'e was the first one on 'and Nicko: 'Arry Steve: 'E was just standin' there Nicko: 'E never turned 'round, 'e never even turned 'round afterwards and said "Listen, did you?...I'm sorry, but you didn' understand wha' I was sayin' right?" Steve: Well why should he? Nicko: Well then, then, then because... Steve: 'E got a fuckin' bollocking Nicko: ...'e woulda stood up for 'imself because 'e knows 'e was gotten a bollocking wrong, because 'e was on a mission from you Steve: 'E was probably... Bruce: No Steve: 'E was probably fuckin' upset... Bruce: 'E's probably a bit upset Steve: ...because you gave 'im a fucking bollocking Nicko: Well, rightly Steve: You gave 'im up for...as far as 'e's con... Bruce: No, not rightly Nicko: Rightly, yeah Steve: But no, it's not rightly Bruce: No! Nicko: I told 'im "DON'T EVER DO THAT AGAIN!" Steve: No Bruce: That's crazy Steve: But what?... Bruce: What 'appens if the lighting truss is gonna fall down on yer 'ead? Does 'e go?... Nicko: Well then somebody drags me out o' the fuckin' way, or else I'm dead, right? Bruce: Yeah, but don't...I mean...you know Steve: I fink your a'itude is totally fucking out of order Nicko: No it ain't. No it ain't Steve: Yes it is Nicko: No it ain't. If I'd 'a known...now I'm the fuckin' cunt all of a sudden Steve: No, you're not the cunt Bruce: You're not a cunt Nicko: Because I told 'im 'e was out of order, n' I didn't know 'e was on a mission from you to tell me that 'is bass, your bass was FUCKED! Steve: I know you didn' Bruce: All you've got to do Nicko, is just go to the guy and say... Steve: You didn' know, n' 'e didn' know, arright? Bruce: "Sorry about, sorry about shouting. It was a misunderstanding. But in future, tell Bill" that's all you gotta say Nicko: No. No Bruce: N' that way, he's a fuckin' proud geezer... Steve: Wha's, wha's the ma'er with ya? Bruce: He goes... Nicko: Look... Steve: Cause if this is some sorta pride...(something unintelligible) Nicko: I bollocked 'im...no it ain't pride. It's, it's not fuckin' pride Steve: Well wha's the ma'er wif ya? Bruce: It is pride Nicko: Oh bollocks! Steve: What's the matter wif ya? Nicko: The guy was wrong to 'ave been fuckin' dere to do wha' 'e done Steve: I know. All I'm, all I'm gonna say is that when you're goin' up tomorrow... Bruce: No it isn't wrong. What's 'e supposed to do? Turn 'round... Steve: ...this is a different a'itude, cause this is fucking stupid Nicko: I told 'im straight out not to do it again Bruce: What's 'e supposed to do? What's 'e?... Nicko: I'm not gonna go out n' apologize for sayin' that to 'im... Bruce: 'E's NOT! Nicko: ...'e was outta fuckin' order Bruce: 'E's not out of order Bruce: Wha' 'appens... Nicko: Bruce Bruce: ...if I fucking go n' tell somebody to do somethin', 'e goes "No, fuck off! I'm not gonna do that." Nicko: Listen, Bruce... Bruce: Then 'e's out of order Nicko: Bruce... Bruce: But 'e goes n' tells 'im to go n' do something... Nicko: ...I'm not concerned wif, wif, wif, wif, wif other people that can't fuckin' talk to me on stage, who don't know 'ow to fuckin' communicate wif me... Bruce: But 'e's not out of order tryin' to do it Nicko: ...'e did not know 'ow to communicate wif me Steve: (walking towards tape recorder) Some cunt's recording this! (tape shuts off)